Belonging

Stupid, stupid girl.
You actually thought that you belonged in this place where your name has no meaning.
Silly girl.
Hasn't it always been the same?
Fake?
Watching from shiny window panes into a world beyond your grasp,
Thinking you're a part of it and then you bump into glass.
Stupid, stupid girl.
You knew you shouldn't have stayed to begin with,
You knew you'd get attached,
You're never able to decide the line and look,
You never last.
You were just an illusion of a part
Which was never really needed to begin with,
You just wanted to be needed.
That's your secret need, isn't it?
To be wanted? Needed? To BELONG?
To belong like that is your home, your nest,
Somewhere no one can chase you away from
No matter what the cost.
Silly girl.
That place will never be.
You knew this as your reality,
You still chose to believe the dream.
And now you cry,
In a corner of a lonely bed,
Feeling sorry for yourself.
Pathetic little girl,
You never learn your lesson, do you?
No one wants you.
Not even you.

Rapture

I see your shy smile,
Looking at my person
While being teased
In the same room,

I see you captivated,
Looking at my face
While creating ecstasy
Sitting on your lap,

And I watch you with rapture
At everything you do,
From waking up to falling asleep,
Every night the same bed,

Rapture at your smile,
The smile, that grin,
Your face, your body,
At the way you move,

And then I feel you missing,
You missing the feelings you knew
Then even through those signs you give
I know this rapture is not shared by you.